Tuesday, November 04, 2008
My (Not So) Brilliant Careers
On the bad days, I think about what I might have done for a living instead of making art. I've written before about my enthusiasm for fashion. If I was wired to be more user-friendly and socially astute – a pretty unlikely 'if' – I might have tried my hand at designing clothes, shoes or accessories. I might have also become a musician or a singer. But as much as I love performing in the spotlight, centre stage, I don't like sharing it. I don't play well with others – in anything. Which is probably why I haven't experimented much with film or video: it's too industrial and requires too many people to do it properly.Writing is solitary and satisfying if, for me, incredibly slow. It lacks the physicality and almost instant gratification of art-making. And I still can't get my head around the idea that it will be eighteen months, maybe more, between the time I begin writing a proposed book and its publication. Even then, unless it finds a big audience, it's unlikely to make enough to keep me in the manner to which I've become accustomed during these few years that I've enjoyed success as a painter.Ah, hell. I wish I could just claim 'diva' as a full-time occupation and get away with it!