Saturday, August 21, 2010

100 Things You Still Don't Know About Me, Part Two

26. My natural hair colour is dirty, sun-bleached blonde. I've dyed it black since my late teens – to match my usual mood.
27. If I could have one conspicuous indulgence in my life, it would be either a Japanese female sex slave or a personal chef.
28. My favourite novel as a teenager was The Good Terrorist, by Doris Lessing. My favourite novel for the last five years has been Play It As It Lays, by Joan Didion.
29. I hate conspicuous branding. I black out logos on the clothing I buy with a permanent marker. Like a good Gen X-er, I refuse to be a walking advertisement.
30. I cut out the labels from all my clothes. They make my skin itch.
31. My high school art teacher couldn't be bothered to write a reference for my application to study art at university.
32. I dropped out of three degree courses. The first was a BA in Anthropology, English, Japanese and French, the second a degree in Visual Arts and the last a degree in Communication Design. I attended less than 6 months of each.
33. I've tried every drug except heroin. Every experience was a waste of time and energy.
34. I used to go to raves with an arts student who's now a senior academic at one of Australia's leading universities. When we did drugs together, he wore a cap with text on it by Jenny Holzer. It read: Protect Me From What I Want.
35. I once shafted ecstasy up my ass. It didn't get me high. It just made my ass tingle uncomfortably.
36. I was 19 when I found my first 'steady' boyfriend. On one of our first dates, I took him to a Russ Meyer double feature at the local cinema. I'm not sure he knew what to make of it.
37. I kept my head shaved from 1993 to 1995, from 2001 to 2003 and from 2008 to 2010. I can't explain why.
38. I prefer the hair on my head long and everywhere else bare. I pay grim Vietnamese women to wax my limbs, pussy and ass once a month.
39. I love the scent of freshly picked lychees, when they've just been peeled
40. I've never applied for an artists' grant. I have no interest in artist's residencies or retreats.
41. I used to wear a badge that read, "Looking for a good man to treat bad". For a while, it was true. The trouble was, I fell for men who were looking for a good woman for the same reason.
42. I put on my first exhibition with a shop-owner who traded Indonesian furniture in a church hall. I had to talk him into it. It had a bigger attendance and earned a greater percentage of profit than my subsequent sell-out shows at commercial galleries. One of my few regrets was turning my back on that sort of independence between 1997 and 2004.
43. I have a blacklist of people I won't deal with – ever. There are several well-known collectors and art dealers on it.
44. I recently declined an invitation to be on a European art reality TV show. I told the producers that artists journeying up the Amazon or into the Arctic were becoming something of a cliché.
45. The man who taught me how to use the net and social media as an artist – and to have confidence in myself – was once rich and notorious enough for his misdeeds to have made the front page of the national press.
46. A publisher asked me if I would help with a biography of the man above. I decided not to.
47. I find exhibition openings extremely boring. I spend a lot of money on my own to make them more enjoyable.
48. My great grandfather's signature is on the rare, bank-circulation-only Australian 1924 George V one thousand pound banknote. His signature appeared on other denominations while he was Governor of the Commonwealth Bank. Unfortunately, I don't own any.
49. Most of my shoes are by Robert Clergerie or Tod's and have been since my early 20s (even when I was broke). I wear not-so-cheap canvas sneakers or skate shoes only when I can't find (or afford) footwear that I really like.
50. When sex isn't an option, I unwind alone by browsing couture and accessories online and reading racey biographies about fashion designers. I secretly wish I was Karl Lagerfeld.
(To be continued)

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